Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The "I Hate The Heat" Rant

It is the first day of June and we are in our third day of the summer seasons first heat wave. Can I just tell you something? Make a confession of sorts here? I do not like the summer.I may be a teacher who gets summers off (except this year when in a fit of insanity apparently I signed up to teach summer school)But do I enjoy the summer??? Nooo! Not one bit!I dislike summer with a fiery passion! 

Do you want to know why?? Well since you twisted my arm I will tell you! Here goes....

I am not like the other Italians in my family, namely my father and brother, who adore, look forward to and bask in the hot weather days. Both of them can be outside for hours on end in the heat and they never, EVER break a sweat! (How is that possible, I ask you?????!!!)They don't even need to be in a pool or anything...they will just hang out in the yard ...IN THE SUN! They are those very fortunate people who just tan naturally. They can be outside for an hour and they will have beautiful, warm, golden tans. They never burn, they never turn red, they never peel. They got all the good Italian genes! Siiiiigggh...

I, on the other hand did not get blessed by the Italian genes that  give a spectacular tan. Noooo, I may have inheirted the dark eyes, the dark hair, and the attitude of my Italian ancestors but unfortunately I also inheirted the pale white alabaster skin of my Irish ancestors.I spend an hour in the sun with SPF 145 and I still wind up red, splotchy, and burnt to a crisp! I do not tan. I merely burn and then spend weeks peeling. This is not attractive or fun.

 I do not glisten sexily in the sun...I SWEAT. I sweat buckets and this is also not attractive or fun. I have been referred to on several occasions as "SWEATY BETTY" by my darling brother. This is not amusing. Also my curls take on a life of their own in the summer heat ...they grow bigger and fuzzier and kinkier. My brother who thinks he is a comedian has asked me on several times in summers past if I needed "Afro Sheen". Again dear brother I am not amused. I am just hawt and sweaty and verging on miserable in the summer heat. I am never amused.

 Actually nothing about summer amuses me. Except ice cream and air conditioning! They always make me smile in the heat.

So now let's take my intense dislike for all things summer and heat related and amplify it to about a thousand percent because now I am pregnant on top of all the other stuff! I am wilted right now. My make-up has melted off my face, my curls have frizzed and knotted up so much I can no longer get my fingers through them, my feet are swollen, my hands puffy. I am sweaty. And not the sexy sweaty either. I am a wilted, melted, pregnant mess here  at the end of the day. I have all summer to go before the lil sweet pea's arrival. How will I survive???? EEK! I am worried that I will melt into a big puddle and never make it to the lil ones arrival.  Summer hasn't even officially arrived yet and I am stressed and hot and uggggg!

But things are improving...I am in the a/c now, feet are free from work shoes, out of my work clothes and in something cool and comfy.So its not all bad now. Now if I just figure out a way to hibernate in the a/c until September!! LOL

Much luv!

1 comment:

  1. Haha I agree. Pregnancy is the summer is the WORST! I take after the Irish/Scottish side in my family and I don't tan, I burn. I'm with you I'd rather be cold then hot. You can always put on more clothes if you're cold but you can only take off so much when your hot, the next thing you kow you are standing in front of the AC in your bra and undies trying to cool off.